Brickbreaker makes my post drinking poops that much better. Sorry, I had to tell someone who might agree.
i would have smoked before this dance, how ever i have surgery Monday and I looked up weed and anesthesia and fatalities was mentioned, so i decided that it would be a bad idea
probs a good idea
i like the whole idea of life and being alive
you sure you're not high?
What's the protocol on showing a video of me sucking the life out of my ex in order to prove beyond a doubt that I give great head???
i love you. like a brother. a brother that i had sex with more than once.
i just sent him like 8 different sexts and he texted me back about how good the hummus is that i left in his fridge.
On campus. Grown men in women's sexy bee costumes. Complete with legwarmers. This cannot be real life.
Absinthe night with my dad again, I could get used to this being home thing.
I am not working on the very first day I can throw up alcohol that I legally bought and drank.
I tried to settle their lesbian roommate fight by turning on Pretty Wild
Ask him to BK for an ice cream cone and do him in the car. That counts as a date
I wonder how long it will take her to realize that I peed in her night stand.
It's a mix of hot dirty sex and week old bong water
I gave myself a charlie horse masturbating this morning. I feel like that really set the tone for the day.
You can’t homewreck what the Lord hath brought together.
It’s official. I’ve hooked up with all three brothers now
You should go after Dad now
I should! He’s definitely middle age fuckable
Randomize
