sooo i think when i get back from rothbury i should probably take a pregnancy test
but you would be showing by now. i'd just save the money and wait for a large crap in 6 months that starts crying. then you'll know.
you kept calling numbers in ur phone book and saying, "I love your show, I'm a long time listener, first time caller."
It just feels so wrong throwing away the condoms into her Hello Kitty trashcan
And this is weird.. I feel slightly less depressed after shitting myself.
Just spent 45mins blow drying a joint i dropped in a beer....i felt like i dropped his infant child....
Keep in mind that he's 43, unemployed and living with his parents. There's really not much we could do to make his life worse.
Tomorrow, you will get a text, and it will bE spelled right, that's me yo, certify ya soon
At orientation, some girl is asking, loudly, where she can get weed. Everyone looks discussed but are paying very close attention to people's answers.
This weekend i learned three things 1) skittles in vodka is good 2) it takes more than a roll of quarters to get a cab home 3) never tell a bartender to give you your change in actual change
For Halloween this year I'm going to paint myself in gold, wear a golden toga and sash saying " cunt goddess"
Well, if it gives you any indication, when I got there, there was already some dude passed out naked in the treehouse.
Nobody will take a lit match to your nipple without warning you this time. Pinky swear.
I haven't heard from him yet. He's either still asleep (which is entirely plausible..... There wasn't much sleeping happening last night) or he's robbing me blind. But I have renters insurance, so either way, I'm ok with it.
Well, I can't remember Thursday and my left ass cheek hurts like hell, I'm guessing Mike's bachelor party was a success.
ever feel bored AND lazy?
I call it "awake" but yeah...
Randomize
