If I see one more duchette wearing Ed Hardy, but not actually having a real tattoo. I swear Im gonna shank a bitch.
yah i'm on my way- is everything ok?
i'm holding a walmart bag of my own hot vomit that i closed up with some random chicks hair tie. we r pretty fucking far from ok
I should have been more specific when I asked for 8 inches.
At Wal-Mart last night I watched two guys scramble for $4.34 to pay for a pack of ping pong balls and red solo cups. They had to put the .34 on a credit card. Winter break begins!
on a scale of 1-10how much freaking out is acceptable if you just found a (possibly used) cock ring in the head board that your parents gave you?
So you used a whole package of smoked meat last night. Didn't eat it, just took it out and put it all over the fridge.
Judging by the hole in the wall by the door, the mis-matched shoes by the door, and the door hanging off one hinge... i'd say he's on the loose.
Is YOLO really just a socially acceptable way to say you enjoy putting things up your nose?
This is going to be the time I got green body paint on Chris' ceiling all over again...
We should go, because after those margaritas time is running out on my sobriety clock.
I love when groups of boys part so I can walk through. It's like a red sea of penises, and I am their Moses.
It's like "hey I give your roommate blowjobs twice a week, want to connect on LinkedIn?"
You full on peed your pants then resurrected yourself like Jesus Christ...
You know, normal sex stuff involves shitting your pants. If you do it right.
Come to my place after work and we can discuss our finances over a coors delight and a fire ball shot
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