I'm gunna smoke cigs today. I feel like I'm in that powerful and gritty mood which requires them
dude, your ex-bf is on match.com
details on that.
well, his profile doesn't say anything about herpes.
just went home with some hot chick. she has posters of the jonas brothers in her room. i basically ran out of the house.
He just said "I made some changes in my life. The male g-spot is in the rectum and I wanted to explore that."
never trust anyone who drives a pt cruiser.... write that down
Atty had lunch with DA and confirmed I am not the target of the investigation. No word on anything else
I realized I'm gonna have to fit cheating on my gf, sleeping with my gf and having dinner with her parents all into one Sunday evening
The nurse gave me a funny look when I said I thought I have an std in my throat. Bet she only does it missionary too
Why have her stay eight hours when I only last eight minutes?
I walked from the hotel to the club with a pint of tequila in my boot. Poured some in a homeless woman's mouth when she asked for change. I've hit rock bottom.
They have a stripper pole on their deck. Normal.
100 proof captain the only man who can make me strip during a snowstorm
If I had your job the next day id be on the news. And not the good news. Like fox & friends. Nancy grace would have my ass.
stoners and superglue do NOT mix
It's a noodle incident. All I can say is that it was completely accidental, no one was too seriously injured, and I'm not allowed back to that bar without a designated pusher for my wheelchair.
Randomize
