It must have been true love
I don't call true love eating a bag of doritos and then going down on each other
The Lord gave Farrah Fawcett 1 wish when she died. She wished that all children in the world would be safe! The Lord granted her wish and killed Michael Jackson.
The ratio was 19 to 1 and the 1 was lauren so it didn't even count.
he's like a stage 5 clinger and he won't even fuck me. he has to be gay. my personality isn't really THAT great.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
A kind stripper put a blanket over me last night
You should be proud. How many people can say they GAVE a stripper an std?
Well, I just did coke with a drag queen in a bathroom so that's the direction this night is taking
We just laid there in bed together, petting his dick and repeating, "IT FEELS LIKE VELVET!!!"
I'm not trying to be dramatic but if someone makes you choose between getting a Brazilian or dying. For the sake of your sanity just fucking die
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He asked me if the reason I slept around is because I grew up in a broken home. I am so done fucking Christians.
I was super naked---except I kept my shoes on, because I'm a lady, and I was bent over a bar.
I AM VODKA MAN
I didnt realize until i got your email that what i've been missing in my life is someone to send me dog gifs
He may have been a dick but he DID give me his Netflix log in. Maybe some good did come of it.
I was left to my own devices with nothing to do but drink
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