I have my period so I felt bad and blew him with cash cab in the background. I wanted to yell out the answers but my mouth was full.
I just woke up in my car with half the wedding cake next to me. This will not end well.
6 figure salary? he just got a little cuter.
It is obvious to me now why clam chowder & beer aren't a good combo.
I told you I was good to drive
dumbass I drove... you sat in the passengers seat and steered with a paper plate
the chick you hooked up with on my couch facebook friended me.
just thought you should know her name is kristen
eating kraft dinner with my face. no forks.
How did a couple beers and monopoly turn into a bottle of vodka and throwing eggs at eachother in the kitchen?
Can an epipen be used as a tranquilizer ?
You peed up the stairs in front of everyone then blamed it on the dog
Thanks for taking care of me. I hope I didn't pee in your car.
Sorry I punched you in the throat. You got in my way. You understand.
Question: have you ever spent your Tuesday evening helping your one-night-stand create a resume? Because I have...
Hey I just woke up in the back of a pickup truck parked at taco bell... Can u come get me?
There were a lot of gay moments in between the Strippers and coke
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