i just realized Britney Spears and I are more alike than I thought. Both of us have our parents in complete control of our lives, we both have restraining orders on previous boyfriends, and we all know both of us can put on a hell of a show
So I have to ask... did I meet your lumberjack expectations? I mean, minus the red flannel and all.
we were playing true or dare on a webcam chat and i was way to drunk ...i ended up having to drink my own piss outta a beer bottle, life couldnt get any worse right now
his blackberry tasks were 1. take names and 2. kick ass
A guy wearing a hard hat while floating the river. It's the most responsible drinking we saw all day.
I woke up to him peeling the skin on my stomach from my sunburn. If he wasn't so good in bed I'd be a little freaked out.
The only thing I remember is doing a toddlers and tiaras dance routine onstage. I fucking CURTSIED.
OMG stop. Pretty feet? Sparkle baby!
The creepiest man is serenading me at the bar right now. I had about a quarter of a drink left and the bartender just walked over and filled it with vodka and walked away laughing.
When he saw my tits he said "wow you should be proud.
I walked into my house with my pants inside out, no shoes and a limp. My mom asked me if I had fun but I passed out before I could reply...
we are not getting arrested this weekend. I don't care who I have to blow its just not happening.
just answer this one ? for me. why is there human shit in my shower right now?
Well I thought I saw everything and then I saw Christmas themed poop bags at Petco.
jump out the window naked night went bad
He burst in the bathroom while I was peeing to hand me my beer I was looking for earlier tht night. And my pants were already down so I thought why not
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