Last night i was gna tell u about how i was watching project runway & how i was upset bc they replaced tim gunn & heidi klum. but then i realized that i was watching mythbusters.
True life - we need to smoke together more often
all i know is i woke up with a braid in my hair and i vaguely remember a cab driver telling me he would give me $10,000 to get him a green card. and he would take me to turkey. and give me free cab rides. im never drinking on my medicine again. lol.
Just got the American Express annual summary for 2009. The amount of bars we visited last year is impressive.
Jus posted an album so big that it takes my manhood into question
They walked in to the store, ripped up the phone book, and left. Can we get on their level?
just got in my apt...and theres jungle juice here i left from over a month ago..this could be interesting...or deadly
They showed a guy on tv in a Brady jersey and a sweatpants boner when the NE offense took the field. They didn't show his face. I hope that wasn't you.
hes like bread. how could bread be dangeous
I just want to trick people into going on dates with me so they can bring back to their houses and let me use their wifi.
You fell asleep standing up against the shower wall
He didn't have much of a personality. But I had like 100 orgasms, so that's cool.
Well, while we went through airport security, I found out Mom got her clit pierced, so there's that.
I'm gonna have to kick a girl scouts ass...
The logic in me says "don't text him" .But the vagina in me says "text him".
Note to self: make sure the door is locked before the handcuffs go on.
Randomize
