I'm the only one here who isn't hooking up, coming out of the closet, or crying because of one of those 2 things.
would it be inappropriate to describe you with the phrase "bigass titties"?
I can't finish this paper in my room because every time I get distracted I start masterbating. I think it's time to go to the library...
Two dudes got up on top of the pianos and danced shirtless. They didnt even get kicked out. I love vegas
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I went in to wake you up this morning and you had a condom draped across your throat like a necklace. There were no boys in the house last night, what were you doing?
Volunteering at a homeless shelter a bum asked if he could lick me cause I still reeked of whiskey. Being a bumsickle=epic hangover
Got home to the hotel 3hrs ago per texts sent not in english to not a full phone number
She is the Michael Jordan of blowjobs. Unfortunately, her baby sister is the Michael Jordan of baseball of blowjobs. It does not run in the family.
She's started this new thing where whenever she drives by random couples talking alone outside she yells "break up! this is your sign!"
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Well I guess I'll go shower now and wash all the stripper off.
You sent me a naked picture of you as a child? How is that normal
The number of threesomes I have agreed to seems to increase every time I talk to you drunk...
I had to join a gym to keep up with this 22 yr old
last time we tried to watch a movie together, we ended up having really aggressive sex. during the Lion King. so what Disney classic will we be ruining this time?
I think the heterosexuals across the hall are negotiating about breeding. How do I figure out which one is against it and back them up?
Randomize