What I dont get about To Catch a Predator is who the fuck still uses chat rooms?
bras are like tupperware for tits, keeps em fresh.
There's a group of australian girls next to me. can't take them seriously. think they are going to turn into mr g
i just shit on the floor of my room. my roommate was in the bathroom, my choices were limited.
My professor complimented me on the well drawn penis on my face then asked if I would like a seat closer to the garbage can.
Just abandoned him for a bowl of soup and the living room floor...hope the window replacement guys don't get a show..I miss you!
I just want you to know that I hid the weed. Once you find another job, I'll tell you where it is. Happy Hunting, bro.
Like for real, is your junk ok? I have to look after my investments.
The man was doing everything in his power to get away from his wife, including go into the gay club.
And remember people can't hear you kick ass in space
I got really stoned and got my certification as an ordained minister. How productive has your day been?
Smargarita sloshedurday tomorrow around 2
Bring a helmet for your liver
My cats name is now jello shot. How much do you love me right now?
I've been trying to masturbate for the longest time now and so far I've accomplished getting tangled in my computer battery cord and phone charger and hitting my knee on my laptop.
Drunk. Come get me. Out front blue shirt.
Where are you? And you borrowed my shirt. I know what you're wearing. How wasted are you?
Hotel
WHICH HOTEL??
Randomize
