At Coney Island the sign for the rollercoaster The Cyclone says, "Make sure your glasses and weave are secure."
i freaking love being in a circle of guys. if i fart none of them suspect me.
Dude, I found out the hard way that she wipes back to front. I ate her out and had to throw up.
So I just saw a commercial for tickle me Elmo furry gloves. And I thought hmm I bet I could jerk off with those. Is that a sign of deepseated charachter issues?
we were hanging out in his room and he decided to play WoW.. so i took off all my clothes while he wasn't paying attention and laid on his bed and started playing with myself.
did he notice?
of course he didn't notice.. he was playing a fiesty level 1 fucker that wouldn't give up..
There's nothing like puking in the airport on the way TO Vegas. Something tells me i pregamed a little too hard.
Just had to pull out another loan to pay for that public drunkenness citation. I am so ready to graduate.
You actually went to class. Im eating dry cereal naked and watching bring it on.
Too many sundays start with me waking up still drunk in my car.
After she asked if she could try to fit her toe ring around it, i decided to leave. Thats the life i live
Instead of getting a taxi some gay black guy drove us home. He is trying to break into the taxi business
Way to promote small business.
Why do guys insist on chatting me up this early in the morning? I'm just like "Dude, I look like the bastard child of Einstein and a troll doll. Let me eat my Hot Pocket in peace."
You slept on a pillow of digiorno
I just saw a kid on iowa campus story that looked like the guy i made out with on spring break.
I cant go through life without knowing what ginger pubes actually look like
Randomize
