I swallowed your vile semen and you don't know what color my fucking eyes are!?
turn left when you see the girl thats puking on the sidewalk. she hasnt been moving much so she makes a good street marker
They are literally fucking next to the DJ Booth to a techno Remix to Pacman. She is going waka waka waka. WHY ARE YOU NOT HERE FOR THIS?!
She gave me a bj in her parent's kitchen while I ate the rest of her mom's birthday cake. Fuck. Yes.
at first i was worried but she assured me her frail vegan body would have no chance at conception.
I just masturbated to the audio from my psych lecture . . . this screwing my prof fantasy is getting serious.
I have six drafts of messages to you that just say "blood" and I have no idea where they came from.
we passed out in our seats at the game for about 3innings. I guess they showed it on the big screen. nap n rally!
A talk about Arizona woman's rights politics has never turned to sex so quickly before.
Diet Starts Tomorrow! Guy from McDonalds asked if I got a new car...
So last night took an interesting turn.. Never thought I'd say I had to pick up my glasses off the floor of a strip club
considering I just took 3 shots of fireball I don't think I'm coming back tonight. also the hulk just walked in crushing beer cans on his forehead
He started praying immediately after we hooked up, condom on and everything.
It's difficult to focus on bonds when you know your classmate peed in your mouth
i think we reached that point in our drunkenness where even the creeps found us intolerable
Randomize
