Drunk in some girls audi what the fuck is happenin i love sb
it's ELEVEN
thirty
this morning he rolled over looked at me and said "oooo, you look like i need a drink" and then put on his clothes and left without another word
then you asked me to turn your jeans into "jorts" just long enough to cover your ballsack
after last night, i judge her for not breaking up with me
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I just beat off to a cartoon porn video. what has my life come to
Lots of explosions. Minor nudity. Full penetration and lots of tuxedos.
i guess this means i'm going to be wearing knee socks during sex again
Let me just say....i'm sorry about setting your carpet on fire. I had no idea that the paper towel would burn that quickly.
cocks speak louder than words, as they say
Nobody says that.
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Let the vodka take you where it will. Like Pocahontas, but wasted
Correction... Drunk on winter break. There are no days of the week on break.
I'm pretty stoned, and for a second I forgot that I'm not actually Barbie and I was getting excited about all the fun we were going to have on my jet.
Now I just sit back and wait to give ass birth to pure evil.
That's why i need nudes. Plutonic nudes.
I just had the polyamorous Canadian hockey player do the splits while naked in a handstand at my apartment just now. And yes, I know it’s 1:30am on a Thursday.
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