Is it sad i was sitting here thinkin how i would only fuck Rob Pattinson if he was glittery at said time.
he left me a 6 minute video of him peeling a clementine listening to justin bieber
She gives me Chlamydia and somehow I'm still the asshole
Okay, good. And if you have one of those portable strip poles that would be nice too.
Next year we will be 30 and no more shots during the week.
using the campers leftover pizza money at the bar. Definition of great counselors right here.
if you ever get a chance to, fuck in a lecture hall. great acoustics. highly recommend it.
I do wanna see you. And we can just lay here and watch a movie and listen to me cry.
I just went to add a song I had never heard before to my "high as fuck" playlist and it was already there.
You are hereby uninvited from future Turnt Tuesdays until further notice.
If it's any consolation, I made really strong brownies yesterday and had 3 and then I saw demons
Well. I hope my dad likes whatever sweater stoned me picks out.
I woke up and my pants were in the kitchen but my shoes were next to my bed. Do the math...
Googled 'how drunk am I' and it was NOT helpful
Why do my weekends always degenerate into using my little brothers childrens board games for drinking games?
Randomize
