i mean i cnt help that this campus has the highest STI rate
I just met a guy from Australia at the bar. I asked him what it was like down under and he told me if I went home with him he'd let me find out. I love Australians.
I accidentally asked my mom for a blowjob because 'mom' and 'molly' are next to each other in my address book.
Drinking Grey Goose on the toilet. Don't make me graduate.
Just had sex in the basement of the library... I knew I was paying $120,000 for something more than a law degree
hey girl hope you're alright, you hit that tree really hard. have a good night.
do you remember yelling at the waitress that you were a power bottom?
I figure hes like disneyworld. You know youre only going once or twice in life. Might as well have fun and ride the rides
How do you think the people in my class would react if I ripped all my clothes off and jumped on him right now?
Speaking of gay, some dude in a life vest just goes, we should pull our dicks out! To larry. Were leaving now. I saw penis
Don't get me wrong, I love talking about lube and such, but why are we?
You have not lived until you have drunkenly grinded on your mother. Daughter of the year right here.
I confess. I just downed the bottle of saki. And I'm singing phantom of the opera to the dogs. Be glad you're not here for the high notes.
Literally just saw a 7 year old intently rub his penis on the metro. I'm not ready for this
lesson learned. Never drop acid before a trip to the aquarium. Sounds awesome, is actually terrifying.
Randomize
