If i come over, it means nothing
I just was on a 20min team conference call where I didn't speak, I used a Gus Johnson soundboard online to answer questions asked to me...the highlight of 2010
I almost stepped in a homeless mans stream of urine as he was peeing. I love this city.
I don't know if I want to live in a world where i can't fuck an exes brother.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He told me I was 100% better then porn then passed out nto the cake
I just held a marble with my kegel muscles for 5 min. You may call me COCKCLAMP 9000!!!!
You kept trying to get the girl i brought home to hook up with you by enticing her with 12 baconnators you brought home
do you ever feel so high you're swimming backstroke and then you realize you're still laying in bed on tumblr
dude, my hangover is telling me there was tequila involved
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
We have a lot of substance abuse to do tomorrow its sleep time
I hope you get eaten by satanic starfish.
Turns out he's not a Doctor Who fan, I mumbled Alons-y as I went down on him. He asked who Alan was. No more drunk sex for me!
You did a cartwheel, it was terrible.
I remember that cartwheel, it was okay.
He has a bear rug in his room. I'm going to ask if we can have sex on it. Wilderness sex.
Do you know why I slept in the yard last night?
You said you watched the lion king stoned and had to do it for simba.
Pride rock will get you every time.
Randomize