Sandra Bullock looks like the most recent Michael Jackson
I just spent my lunch hour driving around campus yelling "TRADE LIVES WITH ME!" to all the freshmen moving in
I told him that all frat guys do it... it was that easy to get him to go down on me.
Ever since he's come out, my facebook stalking experience has gotten uncomfortable
i've already watched her fall off the steps, walk up on our porch and try to dance with the dog, and stumble across the street to stand outside the neighbors window...is it taking it too far to watch this rando girl and some guy have sex behind our parking lot now?
Don't forget your talking to the guy who got arrested for throwing beads back at the Mardi Gras floats. You can't deny that's a first, and neither could that cop.
as we waited for a manager to come open the door that we broke while having sex on the wall, we decided to go round two in the hallway before he came back.. god i love hotels.
He added me on Facebook. I'm pretty sure he got my name from the inside of the bra I had lost in the frat house.
I got my project done and a booty call in all before 1am. I'm a professional college kid.
Right now, millions of people are waking up to get ready for work, start their day, and be productive members of society. I just found a 40 stashed in my fridge. I'm getting daybreak drunk. Zero fucks are given.
Isn't being unemployed beautiful sometimes?
took shots off of a myriad of fake boobs last night. It was glorious.
I know I'm going to throw up tonight it's just a matter of when and where
I guess you never know how much of an impact you have on someone until you sleep with their cousin
You walked in with a bag of weed and asked for a watermelon. For some reason they actually gave you one, and you made it into a perfectly working bong. Two of them offered their girlfriends to you for the night.
i didnt realize that your first thought would be SEXUALIZING BREAD
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