and you tried to get a free burrito from Potbelly's
You kept spitting the skittles out cause you said they tasted like "balls of sandpaper"
my new ipod has external speakers and a video camera...all i can think about is how much more convenient it would be for me to make a pretty decent sex tape
Fine then. I'll just do all this coke on my own this weekend and die. It'll be strictly your fault.
BTW my friend remembers her as "the one with the pronounced chin"
I don't wanna be gay for a night.
I think it would be worth it for free alcohol.
she just announce I'm david copper field and tried to shove a napkin down my throat
Hahaha I don't remember taking it away. But no one should have a sledgehammer at a party. NO ONE.
Officially crunch time. It's my last year of grad school and I've yet to get blown in a school library. The parking garage was less than a block away though.
It's hard picking what to wear when you know the plan is sex. Like can't I just wear my robe let's just simplify this.
And you will die and be carried in a backpack before I allow you not to comply in this tomfoolery.
I swear I'm going to walk in one day with you in a ballgag just masturbating feverishly
Well i can't stand the sound of my own crying
Note to self: make sure the door is locked before the handcuffs go on.
So I'm buying milk, bread, yogurt & lube. Not awkward at all
Basic items
I think the cashier at 7/11 might be planning an intervention for me.
Randomize
