I CAN MOONWALK!
I told him it was like a man's penis, but smaller.
she's about as cool as a sandpaper handjob.
ashley and jimmy are about to have sex on degrassi.... EVERYONES GETTING LAID BUT ME
You cheat on me once, shame on me. You cheat on me with a white girl, it's fucking over
I thought it couldn't get worse until she said "Nipple hair"
a bus full of elementary school kids may or may not have seen me pissing off my front porch this morning
Just got home and found him passed out with his ass stuck in a Rubbermaid garbage can. He must have been like that for a few hours
Youre the drunk baby that everyone wants to take care of.
That's what you get for dating construction workers you meet in tunnels.
On a scale of one to liver failure, how bad would it be if I played thunderstruck alone?
Are we going to go home and do it or do I have time to eat my nachos bell grande first?
I just walked by a dude at the gym covering himself in olive oil.
extra points if i make kids and or the elderly cry
Guess how much it costs to flush your pants down the toilet?
Randomize
