what's Bukake?
a bad idea.
My 3rd grade teacher, who was also my fav, thought i was in prison. That seriously upsets me.
you have to give me like a days notice for these kinds of things, you cant just call at 9 am and expect me to be sober
I just dont understand why you didnt cut me off when I took the funnel into the bathroom and started peeing and funneling at the same time
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
This guy kept running around with a blender giving people shots of everclear and vodka. Best. Toga. Party. Ever.
So far we've hooked up on a pool table, on a public bathroom counter and now in a little league baseball dugout. We haven't even made to a house yet.
Fun fact of the day: Our cat does not like rum.
Tell me about it. Running across highways take alot outta ya. When he found out, he was all "concerned" about it.
I should not be so motivated by a penis, but I am
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
should i save it for someone special or be a feminist and be like "my vagina doesnt define me"
You kicked me our in the middle of a blizzard with a dead phone. I had to give my watch to a pizza delivery person to take me home. You owe me a gyro too.
I feel like I smell like bad decisions
You know it's a pretty bad night when an injured penis is not the worst thing that happened to you. Fuck tequila
besides the unzipped fly, the black eye and the toilet paper on your shoe you looked really sexy today baby!
you thought the best thing to say to him was "you aint no fuckin cop"
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