You found a girl to hook up with at a gay bar?
No. His name was Paco. I didn't get it by choice. I never had a hickey before.
Its only 8 and she is already passed out
Perfect here is wht u do. Gently slip your index middle and ring finger into her butt hole but gently u dont wnt to wake her..let me know when ur ready for step 2
so im kinda of nervous about the whole bust inside event last night
At what point should shame kick in? Realising I had a one night stand with a man engaged or realising I am that man's wedding photographer?
someone just sent me a bong wrapped in christmas paper in the mail. signed 'santa'.
his eyes are fucked up, he bumped into the cabinet while standing in my office, and he's pounding chicken soup, and he must have chewed on 8 pieces of gum before he got here.
I mean, I'm twenty four years old and I've never paid for my own drink. You can't say that any of your ex girlfriends boobs are THAT great.
We have six bottles of wine and we are at target buying baby oil to grease up the sleds with, just in case you're interested.
Where did this racoon skin hat, stop sign and bag full of tacos come from?
Narnia or $5 pitcher night either way
I changed my birth control schedule so that I'm on my period while you're gone this week
I don't deserve you.
Thanks for the bagel and the sex.
I have a guy for practically everything... except for making me waffles on demand. will u be my waffle guy?
I better get weekly incoherent text messages or I will assume something is wrong.
I'm high on the exercise bike at the gym. I feel like Lance Armstrong
Seriously. There were about 4 hours in which I swear my nose was not attached to my face.
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