Do you think he likes his girlfriend's moustache?
clearly I should have checked to see if he was an NRA member before I went back to his house and woke up in Heston's haven.
I had to go to the bank to confirm purchases made on 10/31/09 because they were signed as Lady Gaga
do herpes really smell.
My drug dealer is spending the weekend in my studio apartment. I feel like I've crossed a line that should never be crossed.
Let's not refer to him as Dustin. That makes him seek like a real person, not just a dick I would like to experience.
Sat in the shower and reenacted the "Wiggle your big toe" scene from Kill Bill. THAT hungover.
She's got a butler. A fucking butler. Shes like batman, but with a better ass.
I woke up to find a bottle of Bacardi in my shower rack. How was your night?
Can you please help mom and dad? Theyre trying to figure out Skype, and its like 2 cavemen finding fire.
I like it here so far, only people are a lot less accepting of my terrible decisions and it's cramping my style
definitely good. no good can come from sex in a very full public venue.
someone at the bars was yelling at the bouncer to let him in because he "just passed through the 7 levels of the candy cane forrest" soulmate?
go meet him and give him your number.
Why is no one on Snapchat tonight? I want to see other people having fun so I know it still exists.
I gave in, made out with her, and long story short, I'm giving hetero another try.
Randomize
