Why don't I have your new number? And who have I been texting?
I just want you to know that me val and amanda are drinking on top of a hill lookig at the chicago skyline drinking icehouse and we just peed in public.
What do you want? Don't say anything that would make me look like a pussy at the store.
what about "I will fuck you for a jamba juice" do you not understand?
if you ever come into my room screaming for me to set up rockband at 4:45 am ever again i will kill you
He leaned out the window to puke right as the fan for the ac turned on. All of it blew back up into his face.
So fucked up. Can't tell if I'm starving or about to puke. Playing it safe and eating froot loops. Tasty in, colorful out.
I don't want to die alone with cake watching shows about cake
She looked up at the menu and yelled this is my absolute favorite literacy
just saw a sign in the bar that says "no more naked fridays". Where the fuck was I on these naked fridays?
Why is there puke in my guitar?
Because you puked in your guitar.
SO EXCITED ABOUT STRING CHEESE RIGHT NOW
Always a gay best friend, never a bridesmaid
I got in an argument over whether or not I'm a slut. I argued yes.
I think my stomach is breaking up with me. It's giving me back everything I ever gave it.
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