Is it bad that everytime I read or hear "Woo Hoo" I immediately think of sex because of The Sims?
I just found out why they dont make table-dance tables out of glass.
we were watching porn and trying to copy the position they were doing now i think my hip is dislocated
I couldnt decide if i wanted to pee first or vomit. So i Peed sideways while throwing up into the tub.
He's slept with 25.5 people. Wtf is a half?
apparently they wrote a song entitled "butt slut" about her... im thinking shes not girlfriend material.
The gym is handing out free condoms this week, motivation to work out this week?
Found a dirty envelope on my seat w ur name and $122.50 written on the front. Nothing inside but what looks like dirty pine needles
Yes I want to fuck your friends but it's out of respect and love for you.
I sent him a pic of my tits and he said "Word." I need a drink.
I farted in his bed and then in my drunken stupor grabbed hair defanging spray to cover up the stench.
I did a kegel this morning to determine if I had been penetrated during last night's blackout. Nope.
I feel like we have a good system here turning our sketchy decisions into great stories.
I may not have my dignity, pride or sanity but I have my pants.
Three cheers for handling my crush on my boss in an entirely reasonable manner, by having a threesome with my coworkers.
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