We should be called the Road Head Warriors
The bubbles in my bathtub are singing to me in german....
I kept whispering "I love it when you call me big papa" until she got annoyed and left
i swear, about 40% of my drunken life is spent having sex with him.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Europe's "the final countdown" was playing. It was pretty much amnesty for anything that might happen the rest of the night. It's a rule.
I don't even care that his girlfriend will be there. Us hooking up is a tradition and she will NOT ruin it.
Paris has not been good for her. Everytime she has a one night stand from a different country, she buys a mini flag and tapes it to her wall with the others
Her next conquest seems to be stealing her ex-boyfriend's new girlfriend. Pretty sure everyone involved is totally OK with this.
It's like weed even makes my glasses better. Everything is so bright and clear and beautiful!
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Okay, new plan. Get drunk, eat breadsticks. It's going to be great.
Can I just lay in bed and you pour vodka through a funnel in my mouth?
I punched the bar tender after he cut me off. Hopped over the bar and made my own drink. That's how I got tazed
My house is about to be spotless and the only person visiting is the plumber and not the porno kind.
I just put condoms in a mason jar because it looked prettier than the box.I think I've peaked.
I’M PUT OFF FROM FOOD RN BC EARLIER I GOT SOME WATER AND I WAS 4 SIPS IN WHEN I NOticed A FUCKING BURGER KING F R Y IN MY D R I N K
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