Honestly I wish you never came into my life. I know I don't want you. But I keep trying to get you back bc of the memories
I don't see you I see the memories. All the time
I feel bad for the person that has to clean the dishes that I peed on last night.
Drinking mikes hard & watching the swan princess. i fucking LOVE college
so my class lasted 15 minutes this morning because this kid puked all over himself..only at radford
Two girls down stairs, two girls up stairs and....
We've got ourselves a situation
I swear he shrunk like 2 inches. Remind me that drunk sex needs to remain drunk sex.
Dude, we took our shirts off and set our chest hair on fire. That's a low point.
You raise a valid concern
There are about 5 pictures of my dog taking a dump on my camera and 20 of Brandon taking one for "comparison" reasons.
I still can't believe he turned down that threesome with us in central park. He must be really committed.
I ripped the door frame off last night too. Just remembered.
They invented a new game at work. Its called guess if I'm baked, hungover, drunk, or some combination of the three. Its surprisingly very difficult..
So many Oreos I'm regretting this decision already but I'm happy at the same time...The straddle is real
Struggle. Not straddle. I'm not straddling anyone.
He also wore a doorag last night so i had to swipe left.
Ha! Just garden hosed my vag and thought of you.
Well, I ruined his toilet and he's still completely okay with me. Plus, it took him like a week to tell me.
If a girl I didn't love ruined my toilet I don't think I'd stick around.
Randomize
