So now everyone thinks I don't know what a condom is
Gayer than 8 guys blowing 9 guys
wow, that really makes you stop and think.
i literally would have sex with every single person on this girls wall, but not her
blowing a .13 at 10 AM isn't nearly as cool as I thought it would be.
I was high enough to think that mac-n-cheese w/ ketchup, tortilla chips w/ ketchup, and milk was a fancy dinner
hey as creepy as this sounds i still have your eyelashes on my desk
These eggs taste like chocolate chip cookies. This is the best hangover ever.
In reality u ask do u have beer at your house but what your really saying is will there be cock in my mouth
no dont worry i changed into my costume in the hospital bathroom
I think its awesome that i just got you to cheer for sex
Well sex is awesome. Sex deserves cheers.
Just saw a dude take a shot in the parking lot in his car. Too early in the semester for that
Oh you mean the girl that gave me a black eye when I told her I liked her fake eyelashes?
If we were teenagers we would intentionally be trying to burn down this historic landmark
What?? I could've slept with an ordained minister!
Turns out the grown up version of seeing your teacher shopping is seeing your therapist is on tinder
Randomize
