And I wrote a rap so it was actually a productive afternoon minus not paying our bills.
the jolly green giant just puched the pope. halloween is the best.
We saw a kid playing in poison ivy. We walked away, he'll learn his lesson.
90 In a 65. Talked my way out of it with the i have to poop story. i am the ticket jesus
Tell me why I'm at Target and this entire Spanish family is crowding around the condoms questioning which ones they should get
She had to leave early so she could get ready for her high school's homecoming. I hope her date likes sloppy seconds.
Judging by his buldge, this guy is huge. just paid steve to follow him into the bathroom and find out. They had a convo about it.
Can you send me the video of that girl that got arrested last night? I'm gonna try and hit that and I need something to break the ice with.
the head trauma was worth the blowjob.
I've just never had a dinner guest strut in, go directly to my bathroom, vomit.. then come out demanding whiskey and food.
I woke up at 3am, my head in a toilet, still at the kegger, wearing a random cowboy hat.
When he texted me, I got a little wet. Until he asked me to get Jimmy Johns before I got to his house.
Do drug dealers work on Memorial Day?
You know it was a good dinner party when one of the guests broke their finger and no one can remember how it happened.
we finally found him at 2 am. he was 3 miles from the house and tried running into the lake when he saw us pull up. i don't think he'll be taking ecstacy again any time soon.
Randomize
