The girl I brought home was really impressed with the pile of blow you were doing while watching "Intervention."
I showed him my bush... on skype.
Remember back in the day when getting fingered in the movie theater was the best thing ever?
my mother and i just seriously had a convorsation about why you cant Google "Refurbished Dildos"
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
If your 8 lb baby was ham it would serve 6-8 people
I bought a bottle of 100 proof for the storm. I am going to drink until I pass out. I'm taking bets. 1:30 pm is the over/under.
I think "I actually like giving blow jobs better" qualifies her as a keeper
I walked into a McDonalds at 8:30 am with a half-eaten apple and a solo cup. Never felt so judged.
It's gameday bitch. Man up.
that is either the most profound and meaningful thing i've ever heard, or someone got high before noon again.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I took a dab in Denver and was I. Rocky Mountain national park almost to Wyoming before I realized I missed my turn.
We always have to do something together that tests the human limits of the body. Hopefully it has at least a 75% death rate.
I can't believe there are people our age getting engaged and I can't even find a solid coke dealer.
I responded with revoking his blow job privileges. Needless to say, he's learned his lesson.
You ran full speed into the glass door with your Patron and yelled "FEEL THE RHYTHM, FEEL THE RHYME"
Turns out naked twister is less fun than it sounds. I can never look Lee in the eye again. But Aimee's boobs are glorious.
Randomize