You hurt me so bad and it feels so good
we dont do blackfin have a good night :)
you told everyone your name was brenda and you had the whole party chanting b-dawgg by the end of the night. successful.
I realized tonight the smell of my dirty pads remind me of my grandfather.
just put cider in my bong. gotta love fall
I faked more orgasms with him then ever should be allowed for someone this pretty.
If I had a dick, I'd stick it in some Oreo pancakes
The time to say "now you can't go and be strange about this at work" is not as you are penetrating your coworker. NOW its awkward
I can now say I know getting hit in the face with a flying tortilla is not fun
Your ability to eat ass like its your job and yet turn down quinoa because it's "gross" is confusing.
You stared at a Swedish dude for like 5 minutes then asked him "shouldn't you be yelling at dragons"
yeah it's a weird friendship. we pretend that we're automatic besties but i know we both know i slept with her boyfriend
I passed out with the lights and tv on woke up at 4am SO confused and covered in goldfish so I ate them and went back to bed.. fuck xanax
I just deff did the walk of shame.. His roommate/manager woke us up. A dog scared me on my stumble to the car.
This is why I'm single.
i'm not too sure if he's up to my expectations looks-wise, but in the penis department he exceeds ALL regulations.
Randomize
