the ice cream truck is coming omgomg
dude, it's 2 am.
but its COMING
don't thank me. stop putting your penis in foreign objects.
he held my hand while i was giving him head. freud's gotta be turning over in his grave
I'm pretty sure we got the cab driver deported
I just typed in random letters on his address bar... 5 out of the 6....a porn site was in the drop down list hahahahaha get a life bro.
I just had a dream that I was pulling you around downtown on a sled, from bar to bar. Dear lord if we start that there's no hope for us
He woke me up for a 10am bootycall. he was already drunk when he got here and when we were fucking, bagpipes started playing amazing grace outside of my window!! I love Boston on st. Patties day!!
just in the smoking shack with my sister cheering on a caterpillar make its cocoon
All I want is to get as high as I did that time I started hallucinating that my brother was becoming a monkey and I saw my mum on every surface of your room.
5 hours of volunteer work playing with puppies and banned from the frat I hate most as 'punishment'... Besides the ER trip, I'm not seeing the bad in this situation
Sex while Star Warsing is the best
You wouldn't happen to know why there's an inflatable monkey riding a mattress on my roof would you?
Wish me luck on my new penis adventure
Blueberry probiotics greatly increase to the masturbation experience. Try it dude. It’s all the rage
I’m a little confused...we were told by Cheeto Jesus and his minions multiple times that we would stop hearing about coronavirus the day after the election and, yet, I am still hearing about coronavirus. Is it possible they lied to us again?!?
Randomize
