Weekdays seemed more exciting when I had a drinking problem. Like I had something to look forward to at night.
Fucking him was like shopping for my first training bra.. Embarrassing yet extremely useful
thanks for being the calm eye of my shit storm.
I was tackling you out of excitement
Yeah thank goodness the stripper pole was there to break my fall.
He made me write my name on his wall in crayon so he'd be able to remember it in the morning
I think if I set up a series of baby gates up the stairs each one more difficult to undo then the last that should be able to stop your drunk vagina.
I just caught myself watching and Irish step dance documentary in my underwear drinking nyquil through a straw at 2 in the afternoon. today's off to a good start.
I need to pack up my vagina and leave. We only do bad things together.
Goodbye spring break, hello depressing video on AIDS.
I'm back in the dating scene now... Since the legality issue calmed down. And my stalking charges were dropped.
Nothing like coaching 5 year olds with a bunch of visible bruises from last night's drunk bondage sex.
I'm taking a shit break of discontent as a personal protest
I had my first "Damn Kids/When I Was That Age" rant at work today. We need to drink this feeling out of me. NOW.
My vagina still hurts from yesterday. That's the last time I think riding a mop bucket is a good idea. Don't let me do that again
I really need to get to the point where I can poop at his house. I’ve taken three shits on the way home already.
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