he came faster then a bring it on movie goes to dvd
I seriously need 2 stop fake jacking off in peoples faces at work...the I.T. Guy just showed me the security surveillance tapes.
His bookmark is a piece of toilet paper. No shame there.
I wish I could just thrust my cock straight into her new relationship.
The guatemalans kept making all these sexual suggestions ... With the corn
4 girls bringing me taco bell. this is what dreams are made of.
Unemployment check just came in. As soon as I stop pretending I have morals I'm buying weed. Puff puff pass uncle sam.
Almost screamed "GO FISH MOTHER FUCKER" at the girl I nanny today. Drunken card games shouldn't bleed into my sober life.
She was rubbing her face on the carpet, she was high.
He was just lying in his underwear like a present. I had to unwrap it.
THEY SELL PREFROZEN MARGARITAS AND THEY COME WTH A STRAW. MY PRIORITIES ARE IN ORDER
Homophobes nationwide are huddled in their bunkers tonight and I can't stop giggling. Could be the wine.
Let's be honest, I've seen a decent amount of dicks in my life and very few of them have been worth all the trouble.
The house across the street caught on fire today, Drunk people high centered their car tonight. Looking out my front window I get to watch police chases all the time. I am going to miss this place.
Ugh. All the good hoes are in their third trimester.
Randomize
