IM NOT LETTING YOU PEE ON ME IF THATS WHAT YOURE GETTING AT.
You don't know the meaning of what the fuck until you wake up naked and alone in someone's bed staring at a dead squirrel on their dresser.
True life I used my fake as a photo id for my final. My professor told me good luck and laughed. Hope the bouncers are in the St. Patrick's day spirit.
not to mention it took an hour of antique roadshow to calm my dick down
grown man stumbling drunk down green street wearing nothing but a hot dog costume and crying. its not even noon yet.
he just made me youtube cheetahs running and he thinks he is in a pool
I should have questioned it early on when they said bring beer and chocolate syrup
Yep. How's your hangover?
It's like I fucked its sister and it's getting back at me.
You know you are 86'd from the legacy right? You can't down shots then spike the shot glass
I'm watching porn in spanish. Thats studying right?
Smoking a bowl in nothing but a flamingo thong.
You can’t homewreck what the Lord hath brought together.
There is a moment when you wake up with a butt plug in when you question your choices in life.
There is also a moment when you wake up in a kiddie pool of jello cubes where you question what the fuck you did last night. Are you still in the attic or did you go home.
Why did you have to tell me he has a hammer cock? Now I can’t stop staring at his pants.
Okay so as of now, we may either be coming for one night, two nights, or not at all this weekend. It depends on Laura's toe and if I get my period. Will explain later
Randomize
