Wish I didn't live with 3 girls so I could beat off in peace.
Had a speaker in class today. She asked whats the first question when you see someone pregnant. I said whos the father? She was looking for "is it a boy or a girl?"
I just walked by a party bus on my way to study. God hates me.
Taped crackers to the wall. Sat I'n the dryer. Bobby had to pull me out by my hair. No more.
You need to braveheart it on Monday. Blue face paint and a loin cloth screaming freedom in your front yard.
The goal for tonight is vagina. In and around. Doesn't matter who. How. Or why.
SIMBAAAA REMEBER WHO YOU ARE
I wish I cared about making my vagina as presentable as you do.
I'm just saying; the box truck will cost less then dorms or rent, and we can always crash where the party is.
Cause I know you wanna ride the D like a Vespa in ROMAN HOLIDAY
WHAT IS WRONG WITH YOU
MANY MANY THINGS AND MOST OF THEM ARE YOUR FUCKING FAULT
you never keep up with shots anymore
I'm trying to be more responsible these days
you fucking tried to take your pants off and pee in Taco Bell's parking lot
Ok so I need a recap of last night...
YOU SPENT SIX DOLLARS AT NICKEL BEER NIGHT!!! How's that
I have serious attachment issues. I just realized how long its been since ive smoked out of my bong and I feel guilty for dis owning it this week
Let me set the mood for you. Do you remember Britney Spears in her Hit Me Baby One More Time era? Well I just fucked this college girl I shit you not her name is Persephone and she looks exactly like Britney Spears back when she was hot. I might be in love.
Randomize
