Hey, do you have a beer bong you could drop off at my little brother's place?
quick i need to know how implid consent works for golf carts
too late i think im gettin a gcui
at this rate if someone im actually interested in likes me back im going to die of surprise before i even get to make out with them
He literally is quoting that 21 questions song, the 50 cent one. oh my god.
Does the blue bra belong to your sister or cousin?
was i strangled at any point last night? or was his dick just that long
guess who's bored in chemistry researching how to sneak weed through airport security in her vagina?
They are chanting tits for freedom and I'm highly considering
Whiskey shot with bacon bits, our version of Goldschlager WE ARE TRYIN IT.
Shit. I'm running the whole hotel right now. The front desk girl had to run home because she left her vibrator on the counter and her brother, mom, and grandmother surprised her and are showing up to her place before she gets off work. This will end badly no matter what.
Yes she was blowing me but I couldnt see her face. The only light was from the sparklers she asked me to hold. I love 4th of July.
You don't realize how cold it really is...I poured my bong out the second floor window and icicles hit the ground.
Well I mean he still had sex with me after I told him that I play fetch with the kids I take care of, so I'm not really looking too far ahead with him...
I ran into a wall that clearly had things popping out. My eyebrow was bruised, both arms, the bottom of my foot. Lost half of my finger nail, my fake eyelash was stuck in my hair and I have about 47 blurry pictures of a half naked zombie DJ.
I'm slacking. We've been hooking up for months and I have yet to bang him while he's wearing the clown mask.
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