omg a stripper jus od'd on stage.
i'm at the st pattys day thing. the bar is packed. they just put on celine dion its all coming back to me now. i'm screaming the words.
it's 1 pm.
Not till Sunday. I'm going to sleep in my car. And I know. This place is insane. Blood on the stAirs 5 dollar slices of pizza. A girl on our floor had a stroke.
you know I love you but I need to see your friends tits
I said:" get your jacket, get your beer and get the fuck out of here"
Firing someone with a rhyme is the new high point in my life.
Thanks for your number, i want to ski with you, do party with you and sleep with you. Lucas.
we were hooking up and then he goes "you can touch my penis" and i laughed too hard to do anything. no second date.
Ahh, 151. Think of it this way: it took one shot to get you buzzed, I took eight. I may or may not have broken a tv with my skull that night and met someone's parents naked and hungover the next morning.
I'm just trying to absorb as much of the fluids from the carpet as I can.
You drunkenly hook up with 5 people in one night and suddenly everyone tries to party with you.
And then he said he wanted to "get really weird with me on my horse." I took that as he wants to fuck me while riding my horse. Could be a good time.
You told everyone to shut up then told the officer that you are 21 when you drink.
you woke up this morning in a laundry basket, only wearing rainboots.
Last night I realized my life is an experiment of really bad decisions when I had to leave without my underwear. But at least I'm expanding my life experience.
He took off all my clothes, fingered me, than said "would you be more comfortable if I was naked too?"
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