OH GOD PAJAMAS ARE SUCH A HARD CONCEPT RIGHT NOW
you made me have a moment of silence for the half of a sub sandwich that you dropped on the floor earlier
the guy in the stall next to me, came in, farted, laughed, and proceeded to give himself some sort of hillbilly pep talk that included the phrase "big pussy".
This is breast cancer awareness month... The least we can do is give a stripper some singles.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
im destined to be single forever. i hope its okay if your kids come and hang out with my cats.
The only thing I remember is vomiting and then feeding my dog a Mcdonalds cheeseburger and telling him yolo
ur mom makes the best bacon
WHAT ARE YOU DOING IN MY HOUSE
So I vote that we skip the bowling and just go straight to destroying our livers.
You are a lesbian wizard with red hair. You are willow
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
There's s woman at the corner of the bar dancing by herself in her seat and making eye contact with me. Please hurry.
Whatever I'm getting wasted, my costume's bomb, and there's a good chance I'm getting laid. Not letting stupidity ruin my night!
I think my teeth are moving, they feel like people.
At this point, I wouldn't be surprised if he laughs at all of our attempts to keep him sober.
Is it totally acceptable to fuck a co-worker even though we don't speak the same language?
Why do you even have to ask me that question
I expected my Sunday morning walk of shame dressed as a sexy Dorothy would get some scorn, but nobody seems to even care
That’s because it’s 2020. The slutty costume walk of shame is a refreshing reminder of a time when wearing masks and catching communicable diseases was a right of passage, not everyday for the foreseeable future.
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