what's the vibe there?
extraordinary amounts of gine
did he really ask u insert a warm banna in ur anal?
Last night was def like the makeout party episode of full house
got in a fight at the bar because some dude thought i was being sarcastic when i told him "sweet mustache". it really was a sweet mustache
His mom took away his car and made him quit his job.
HE'S 26!!!
You talked to that cop for like 15 minutes and when you got back, you told us you were "networking".
Dude its so hot it my room I can't jack off. Its gonna be a long summer.
just when i thought i had forgotten how badthe sex was he comes across campus solely to say hi
you referred to yourself as the crossing guard because of your neon shirt and began directing bar traffic
I want to figure out a way to work "if you suddenly die, I might turn into an extreme hoarders" into my valentines day poem
You stared at the ground for like 20 minutes willing yourself to get sober
I threw a hotdog at the security guard and called the bartender "goodlooking for a 35 year old who was rode hard and put away wet"... I would have kicked me out too
LOVE ME MORE THAN PIZZA CAN
just creeped your profile pictures and you should feel satisfied in knowing that you had great eyebrows even before people started drawing them on
You know you're drunk when you have to be picked up out of a bathtub.
Randomize
