well if you came here i would keep you awake :*
did you just kiss me??? ... dude, im not gay
he wasnt completely random
you're right. you met him once and didnt know his name. you still dont
i get things done.
I wish they made sweatshirts for legs
you mean pants?
we just made rock paper scissors into a drinking game
i mean he wasn't bad looking, but i wouldn't have slept with my professor if i knew everyone would get an A
You two were too busy to notice that his used condom landed on me when he threw it.. Thanks.
in my lab write-up should i mention that i watered my plant with tequila?
I need a vacation from myself..this is duely noted after I tried giving myself a concussion last night
I like how he had to correct himself in stating that I was the fat one in the threesome.
I would agree. Whose business is it if I like to guzzle vodka by the liter on my of time? Answer: mine.
He reached a whole new level of creepy. We were getting a coffee and he noticed the girl at Starbucks name tag looked her up on fb and friend requested her right there without ever introducing himself
He was pretty bad, I wanted pizza the whole time.
You are talking to me during sexting hours. Be careful, innuendos are taken seriously
Yah. Then he started clapping my boobs together in his hands and started shouting "the seas are angry!"
Have u seen my vagina and my gorilla costume? Im in need of it.
Randomize
