Already tried, she's too smart for that. I need a Primos "Do your wife in the butt" lure/call to trick her into wanting it
it's circumsized.
I think this conversation is over.
I tried really hard to get you laid last night. And by that I mean I asked a bunch of dudes if they were top or bottom.
Sunday Funday has been cancelled indefinitely, due to lack of self control of all parties involved.
Don't underestimate her when she starts going by "the vodka queen"
I was worried he'd break you after the hiatus your lady parts had to take from social interaction.
My therapist keeps stopping to ask what 'hooking up' means
ITS ORAL SEX CAROL
So if her brother fucks my brother, can I just tell her that anal sex is in her genes?
OHMYGOD I LITERALLY JUST FINISHED JERKING OFF AND MY MOM BUSTS IN AND HANDS ME A BABY WHAT THE FUCK IS GOING ON IN MY HOUSE JESUS H CHRIST!
I was just hotboxing under my sheets and I got lost on the way out.
It was so scary.
I like how she'll post a picture on Instagram with her boyfriend and 2 hours later you'll send me a snap of her panties on your rear view mirror
He knows whenever I get drunk I'm going to call him and make fun of his major. Its like a reverse booty call.
Do you not realize that being Batman fulfills about 95% of my non-sexual fantasies?
there's no judgement here...i was recently just fingered in my dorm hallway while having a conversation with 5 people.
Met this british guy. Played pool. Broke into an apartment and had sex
Randomize
