I'm afraid we're only dating because we're too lazy to look for anyone else.
you know it is a bad morning when you forget to brush your teeth and eat old gas x in your car because its minty...
BROstal carolina. Watching a boy drinking rum and coke out of a cup of noodle empty cup.
Say it nicely.
Fine. I want to lovingly bend you over and lovingly fuck the shit out of you. Happy?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
$5 long island pitchers = roommate pissing on his laptop at 3am.
You just handed me your ATM card and wrote your PIN number on a dollar bill and said "for bail money."
I was just handed jelly beans by a guy in a penguin costume. Standby for confirmation on if they are actually drugs.
Even completely stoned shes amazing on the piano. There are like 7 people sitting on the ground listening to her like she's the messiah.
This is love.
Which part? The alcoholic cupcakes or the lesbian st paddys day party?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
It's all fun and games until some random starts jerking it on the deck.
You were spooning an empty magnum of white wine in the middle of the bed so I slept on the couch
Well at least there's no more confusion about your place in my life. Wine > pizza > your dick > the rest of you.
Love you...
A good drinking club with a running problem, improves endurance in both I have observed this evening.
2 for 1 beer results in multiples of 2 so what should be a beer or two becomes 4 or 6. But running, alleviates the need for a DD.
I'm nothing if not determined to sleep with everyone at that company
Pretty sure I have a sex related back injury. I'm not sure if I should be proud or ashamed.
I have decided that I would still fuck Harrison Ford even though he is old as fuck now. Do you think it would kill him?
Most likely. But I bet he'd do a bang up job of it before he died.
He absolutely would.
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