Operation extremely regretful is in full effect
Had a 3 sum last night, and today food just taste better and the air seems so much fresher!
I take no responsibility of who alcohol hooks up with using my body!
we had sex three times last night.. but now im just wet from him crying on my stomach about how much he misses his ex.. awesome
i just looked at the calendar to see when spring break is and literally stopped eating
Theres just something about looking at pictures of your dick in church that doesn't feel right
I'm going on a nature/throwup walk. Don't lock me out of the apartment.
Between cock and motorcycle I'm glad I don't have to sit at work tomorrow
Being at this bar with grandma is a real cockblocker
We got caught having sex in the bathroom by my professor. In accordance with tradition, we still brofisted. I think my grade went up considerably.
my math prof is telling us what to do in a gun fight. i dont want to live in oakland anymore.
Just saw a man in a motorized chair roll by drinking a beer. It's 9:45 AM. I love Louisiana.
Uber driver offered to have sex with me since I went home solo. - rock bottom
I'm gonna ask his dad. Weed trumps broken heart any day.
Where are you guys?
Drunk
Randomize
