am i the only one who has tried sucking their own cock????
i'm as serious about my hair as jesse from full house.
that is uncle jesse to you, show some respect.
My mom gave me a book called "why good people do bad things"
I didn't realize you were one of the "good people"
I think she's a little more wasted than usual. She just crawled on the floor to tell mom it was time to take a shot.
I give you the lube, you make me the mac and cheese, that's a pretty fair deal I think.
My mom just told me to make sure my face isn't on the front cover of the newspaper on 4/21. Challenge accepted
Im the proud new owner of the campus speed bump sign
By the way. I expect to test the theory of you running a mile drunk for memorial day.
I never thought I would have to put a band-aid on my penis.
driving home hungover today was like a life test..it was like the goblet of fire
Can you come get me? I woke up in the woods behind the Super 8. I have pizza.
Keep in mind this was 2012... YOLO was a very new concept.
Apparently I was carrying around a bottle of listerine calling it 5 loco
So being hungover in an office full of people with hangovers for 9 hours is quite possibly what hell will be like.
How many weight watcher activity points do you think sex is worth?
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