she says it's "been amazing lately"
i think basically because i hate her so much i'm trying to break her in half
Talk about awkward... Just went to dinner with my mother and realized I fucked our waiter the night before. She HAD to see the looks he was giving me!
Tell us when you see the semi truck on fire.
I'm not gonna lie. having my legs shaved for me in the morning was a lovely surprise.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Just got physical proof that at 6 am i was running around with raw potatoes threatening to mash them on his floor. Hello, Mobile uploads
There was just way too much discussion about my penis at that party
I made the jerking off hand motion to my mother by accident this morning. It was awkward for everyone involved.
Nothing says "Good Morning" like Jell-o shots and coffee cakes.
He is full of southern hospitality and I want to be full of him.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Come now. I'm bloody but I'll give you the best fuck of your life.
I'm sorry about the spring break comment. I won't make anymore pornos, I promise.
I don't know, we got really drunk and I slapped her with an ear of corn.
A sultry night of tacos and sex sounds nice. Should I bring home milk?
Keep your fingers crossed. If I get to go to a Stanley Cup game I'll give you the blowjob he deserves for taking me. Because hes definitely not gettin it.
It's weird having sex with someone you actually like
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