If it wasnt for meatballs I would have fucking killed myself already.
Just saw a denim jacket with the phrase christian cowboy...ridin with the lord under a picture of a cowboy in a sunset. I'm def in mississippi.
That drug basically just makes anything that's in your mouth awesome
There's three frat guys comparing how you were in bed. apparently you have gotten worse with time
do you think you could subtly ask him about the dimensions of his penis?
I may be a little fuzzy on this, but I think at some point I said something about being a generous lover.
I just took a shower and found half a cookie melted under my boob. Please tell me there's a reason
I just entered us to win a trip to Vegas for spring break. GET YOUR VAGINA READY FOR THE ULTIMATE DICK HUNT!
You know it's been a while when you're having to resort to positive conditioning to get women
I have family pictures in an hour and a half and I'm 9 beers deep. This is how I get written out of my grandparents will...
And I wasn't prepared because its been a very long and lonely season and I wasn't expecting to find dick at Press Box trivia night....
Today in French class my teacher was singing "what does the fox say" so i started answering in similar satanic ritual noises
My mom wants to name our new dog the same name as my fuck buddy. This will be weird
i don't know how to react to you in a diaper crying and calling a football 'sadie'.
Legit hope my Trump humping Brother dies of this shit so I can stop pretending to still love him.
Randomize