I just want to hang out with her.
You're a liar. Why do I have to give you reasons you can't have sex with my mom? I hate you.
How do you get eyebrow wax out of your butthole region?
The fact that you aren't ashamed to ask that is the reason I will give you the answer. Under the sink there is a bottle of wax remover. Throw my waxing kit away as well.
So there is a guy driving a robot around the college of engineering selling energy drinks
She put up a picture of her grandmother on facebook, looks like the lazy eye runs in the family
He said to me this morning that we should finish these beers, go and get plan B then on the way back, go to the pub to celebrate the death of our baby. I love Manchester.
I still don't know why you took that job... it sounds miserable
not having any beer money sounds even more miserable
so i guess now we know you can get away with peeing mere feet from the Capitol if you shout IM PREGNANT at the guards
Let me know when ur ready so I can throw up one last time then brush my teeth
your vagina must have magic restorative powers I feel rested and powerful this morning.
We started a fund for a baby in a wine glass, I think we're pretty responsible.
Remember when we made out in a Chik-Fil-A drive thru?
Do not ever look at a picture of an erect ostrich penis. You will regret it.
I wonder how horrible I look to customers. There's cuts all over my face and I can't talk.
What are the cuts from? Head-butting the bathroom light fixture?
Honestly that's best case scenario.
We're so high we're eating flavored lube.
I'm still thinking about that amazing orgasm last night. I literally heard angels singing "Hallelujah!!"
Randomize
