He tried. I said no. He said, "It's ok if I do this?" and proceeded to jerk himself off. Oh, the French.
I'd suck anything for a pizza right now
You want anything?
Gatorade and you naked.
At one point last night I over heard you say " I'm gonna puke in a bag and pour it down your throat" I LOVE YOU.
And then he posed under the bed and said, "you should draw me like one of your french girls." Why do they keep giving this kid drugs?
We won 11 games of beer pong, and then I spent a half hour trying to get into the top bunk. Then i realized it was a cabinet in the bathroom
So I thought the party was crazy before his pinky came off...
NO I WOULD NOT GET A GUMMER FROM A GRANDMOTHER
I fucked my cousin and caught chlamydia this year. I can't really harbour any illusions about myself anymore.
PA to anyone at the party last night and wondering where your pants are: they are in my backyard.
Brought some lesbians back to the light side of the force
When he was going down on me I referred to him as "Lord Snow" and HE GOT IT. HE GOT THE GAME OF THRONES REFERENCE. I AM IN LOVE
The amount of effort it's taking me to not shit my pants this morning is probably a sign to slow down the drinking
I just slammed a bottle of white wine before I came to Whole Foods so basically I'm just training to be a middle aged white woman.
It took me twenty minutes to read that sentence.
All I said was okay...
Randomize