Hurry. And bring back up. SHE WON'T STOP TALKING.
i grabbed his hand and told him i loved him and then he looked down and said "i love...mallomars" and shoved like three in his mouth. never been so embarrassed.
woke up rolled in a yoga mat listening to enya. I'm never going back to Oregon ever again.
He just made a mudslide using rubinoff and swiss miss packets. This can't end well....
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Hahahaha you would not believe what I just pulled out of my vagina. Actually you probably wouldn't be surprised.
I just let my hand run under cold water for five minutes. I couldn't stop staring at it and the only things I could think about were how amazing it felt, how cool water was, and what a wonderful world it is that we live in. Reasons why I don't smoke...
There were two girls and a guy on a bed and now i can put porn director on my resume.
I send him pictures of my tits whenever I feel like he's paying too much attention to his girlfriend.
If I get laid dressed as one of the McPoyle twins, I deserve all the medals.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
The dorm caught on fire so it turned into a 5am pool party
Did u know it's unconstitutional to turn down a shot during 4th of July celebrations.. Rest now dear liver
Pedi-lyte stocked
he puked all over my guest bed and the said he felt good enough to clean it up. he poured bleach all over the bed and passed out in it. he had the chemiacal burn for a month...
$1 drinks and Playboy theme. I am never leaving this place
He fell asleep on top of me after sex. For 3 hours. Poor guy worked too hard.
I a very close black and white picture of my slightly erect penis and I blew it up put it in an art gallery for a show coming up and somebody bought it for 30 Grand!!!
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