Barsexuality is the new black.
This is the prime rib incident all over again
If her picture on my phone wasn't mostly of her breasts, I'd never pick up the phone when she calls.
Wait, how is it that I'm just getting ready to go out and you're already showing your penis to freshmen girls?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
If our dicks could shake hands in congratulations they would
He woke up, mumbled "silverware", and went back to sleep
The water at the venue tasted HORRIBLE so I just kept drinking booze. It was like the medievals.
Because nothing screams stable like yelling at a guy in a bar because last time you hooked up he stole your underwear.
No, it's cool, I just bounced from the hospital. I was...talking to a security guard, maybe?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
This feeling I'm having... is it love or a combination of alcoholism and unprotected rough sex
I told him that if he cleaned the bathroom, I'd blow him. You could eat off the toilet. Seriously, get over here. This is the cleanest you'll ever see it.
In Punta Cana for my bachelor trip, hopefully tomorrow my passport is blacklisted
He nailed that bed down really well so it won't break again. All I could think while he was nailing it was "challenge accepted".
if they didn't want us to do blow at uni, why would they make textbooks so smooth?
There better be alcohol at this child's birthday party. Seriously not trying to be entertained by a clown while I'm still sober.
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