I hope you get used to having plenty of sperm because you're never gonna get any.
Its not like he dircectly choose a cheeseburger over sex, it was more like I said seductively "I really appreciate this and I'm going to make it up to you anyway I can" and he replied "i want a bacon cheeseburger"
i guess he just knew i was going to sleep with him either way
I just foul balled at work. I had taken off my coat too… had to go to the sink wash my hands then go back to the stall and pick up my coat. I hope the guy shitting in the stall next to me didn’t figure out what happened.
Remind me tomorrow to take that ball-gag out of my purse.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I really wanna know when trying to grow up turned into try not to throw up.
Don't forget: you only show your tits for the good beads. Be judicious.
Sometimes I hate my life and then I remember I live in the WORLD CAPITAL OF RUM
I passed out with my wizard stick taped to my hands and got woken up being poked with a St. Bernard
I think animal control just caught me smoking a bowl on the back porch. Do they have any say in this matter?? Haha
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
five cans of playdoh and a game of guess whose penis ...
The guy at the bar repeatedly told us he was an off duty cop from out of town, that to normal people would be the time where you stop asking him to smoke a blunt with us
Yep if he's taking selfies he's probably on drugs again.
Gary just stuck his dick in his Guinness. I can't even make this up
Anyone who can sit 4 hours in a doobie circle with their feet in a kiddie pool is ok by me
Where'd you go?
Laundry, im. A responsible drunk
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